Hannu Rasila Ky Kananmunia 10kpl

At the S-Market in Helsinki, 2009. Here are some handsomely packaged eggs from my neighborhood supermarket. In Europe, eggs are commonly stored on market shelves without any refrigeration, which deterred me from buying them for several weeks because this practice seems incredibly unsanitary. The USDA recommends refrigerating your eggs, but apparently there’s some disagreement on this point. Although the internet says eggs are “time bombs of disease if they aren’t kept cold,” it also says that American food guidelines are “overly-protectionist” and suggests that European chickens may be healthier. I finally made some scrambled eggs this weekend and I’m feeling pretty much okay.

And just like in America, there are far more brands and styles of eggs than I think are necessary. Since the packaging is all in Finnish, I simply go by the design. Which reminds me…

At the Met Supermarket in Brooklyn, 2004. I clearly have not purchased eggs in a long time. As I was about to reach for the standard white Styrofoam container of large Grade AA eggs, I was taken aback by all of the different cardboard and plastic boxes advertising their contents as cage free, organic, vegetarian organic, free of animal by-products, earth-friendly, and so on. These new socially conscious eggs ranged from $3.99 to $5.49 per dozen, which is a fair cut above the usual $2.29 for the default Styrofoam version.

I like to believe that I possess a decent attitude towards poultry and livestock. I’ve read Fast Food Nation and made notes of the awful things companies like ConAgra do down in Arkansas. I also try to avoid eating veal. However, I resent being forced to declare my eco-politics at the grocery store. This should not be a consumer-based decision. Rather, there ought to be a reliable agency charged with ensuring that egg companies do not torture their chickens, give them drugs, or feed them cardboard, cattle, or children.

There were so many new & honest-looking brands of eggs competing for my attention by declaring how well they treat their chickens (one carton announced that they don’t give their chickens steroids, which I always hoped could go without saying). I spent nearly ten minutes sorting through all of these slogans and promises. The fate of chickenkind should not rest on my shoulders and if it must, I cannot be expected to make a decision based upon a few vaguely responsible sounding terms. 

So what did I choose for my omelette? The basic Styrofoam ‘Quaker Farms’ container that did not say a word about how it cared for its chickens. I’m a creature of habit. Besides, how nasty can Quaker egg farmers be?

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Autechre – The Egg
from Artificial Intelligence. Warp, 1992 | buy mp3s
After seventeen years, it’s difficult to properly recall the impact that Warp’s Artificial Intelligence compilations had on electronic music. Much of it doesn’t hold up very well, veering into Muzak melodies, chintzy chords, and canned breakbeats — but the first installment delivered Polygon Window, Seefeel’s “Spangle”, and an introduction to Autechre’s softer side. It also broadened the possibilities of techno. Unfortunately, it also spawned god-awful terms like ‘IDM’ and ‘braindance’ which have thankfully disappeared under the painfully generic yet comparatively dignified umbrella of ‘electronic music’.  

Although “The Egg” is a relatively low-key track, Autechre throws the kitchen sink at this one, with staggered vocals, a bit of deejay scratching, and layer upon layer of bold keyboard action.